Ride Leader: Marty
15 riders this week, the lowest for a long while, mainly due to injuries –
CRASH ! Gaz is out with a bad leg after a huge off on Sunday trying to out jump Ade – Gaz, Know Your Limits!!!!
CRASH Johnsy still out with stitches in his shin after his slip last Wednesday – Johnsy less of the excuses we all know the wife is clamping down on your social life after the appearance of Will.
CRASH Chris Watkins still has a sore KN#@ having to do all those household activities – KNEE is what I mean!!!!
The Moo’s solicitors firm of Crock, Jock & Slug were out at a Charlotte Church concert in Cardiff
Knotty was absent, probably feeling the pressure of being top of the Merits – bad Move Steve not much time to go now, Russ is back at the head of the Herd
Welcome to Richard Pitman, a solid 1st appearance with the Moo’s from the ex-racehorse jockey and pundit. Good to his steed not listening to the commands of “Whow Boy” and “easy does it lad” as it threw him off a few times during the ride.
To the Ride – Marty was in the stinking jersey! And everyone was looking forward to a quick finish by 8 o’clock so he could get home on time.
Off into the forestry care of a different singletrack through the woods and on to the forestry trail. Loads of stop starting as the old meddler was blocking all narrow paths and causing mayhem amongst those behind him. (thinking back Ant was seen heading towards Gordon’s before the meet and he advised he had to go and witness something for Gordon), a smokescreen me thinks to what is obviously Ant’s new business venture – “Home Help on a Mountain Bike”. Next time you dress him for the ride make sure his pants are inside his tights will you?
Onward down the quarry run and back up towards GARLIC !!!!!!! Here we go again, I thought. I successfully maintained my 100% record on the beast by crashing yet again!!
NB – OBE did comment how the better skilled riders at the rear always held back so they can tackle the rougher terrain that has been left behind by the lesser skilled riders at the front !!! Geoff probably more merit deduction’s coming your way.
On to the Hollybush, whose address is Rudry Road, Draethen, Lower Machen NP10 8GB telephone number 441326 and not – ‘Gorse Cuddling’, Top of the Path, The Mast, Mynydd Machen TW4 T5. Telephone number – No reception. Ant, Owgie and Rich please take note.
Up Ochrwyth we stampeded, only to catch up with the Three Amigos, hoping they hadn’t frozen in the chilling night. They were ok, as their human survival skills came to the fore, and they embraced each other to keep warm, it was at this point that Roger asked if he could disappear with them next week.
Right to the top we plodded, and onward down through the trees to the Railway Line and the back of Graig View, thankfully no casualties this week.
Back at HQ, Gordon took off his Balaclava, at which point new boy Richard said "S**t he’s Effing old isn’t he!!!!"
The conversation once again centred a round our senior citizen and he advised that his favourite colour has to be ‘Olive Drab’. Colour we said Gordon, Not Lover!!!
Any way my research shows that at the ‘eye for colour’ exhibition at Liverpool’s World Museum in 2006, out of 2600 people who answered the question, ‘what is your favourite colour’, there were actually 4 people who said Olive Drab!!! To assess the kind of people that our Gordon has this association with I provide their comments as to why they like this colour -
Galli Elisabetta from Italy said – “It’s the colour of the future” (yes with all the wars to come)
Una-Barras Hangan from Cairo Egypt said – “reminds me of Safari clothes and lush green game reserves” (Bad memories of an act of bestiality in Kenya)
Liam Everill from Stoke on Tent said – “It is pretty and I like it on t-shirts” (he must be gay)
Suzie Frost from Timbuktu said – “because I am drab” (barking mad)
What an evening dinner party those 4 and Gordon would make – total entertainment I Think!!!!!!
This led us on to Parachutes – Daf ! oops !
Here’s looking forward to more Machen Miggly Moo Mayhem, next week.
Over and Out (just like on Garlic)