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Captain Beaker - How many off-of's will be written here

7th May 2008


After last weeks wet and cold ride it was great to see that the summer had finally arrived with blue sky’s and warm weather, ideal riding conditions.

This week’s ride was lead by Russell, looking a bit hot and sweaty in the rider’s jersey, up Turners and then on to do the classic 2 peaks ride, with a pub stop in the Forge Hammer. It was nice to be warm and dry for a change and the 23 Moos were in good spirits even if we lost a couple on the way:

Option with his ‘Old Injury’ – the bad back – he blamed it on his new bike!

Gaz who made half the ride but went home with man flu – he was seen doing a very good impression of a sh*tting dog at the bottom of the first descent.


The crap speech this week consisted of reminding the Moos of the forth coming downhill event and then going around confirming entries. There were a few notable back peddlers, they included:

Tom – he claimed he needed to work as his cash supply had dipped below £10K

Owgie – Yuppy flu

Slug and Lettuce – Digging holes somewhere

Crock – Can only ride around in circles due to excessive strength in his right arm, not too sure what sort of training he has been doing!


But who was going to be the Sam Hill of the Miggly Moos.... well we’d have to wait until Saturday.... the sensible money was on Roger (according to Roger!).



Saturday arrived sunny after a night of showers and the forecast was for sun all day which make a change for a Miggly Moo event.

Everyone met at 10.30ish in the Fwrrwm Car Park where Pealy proceeded to start a sweep stake which got everyone thinking and a few nervous. Beers were handed out to the competitors and video cameras and instructions handed out to the helpers and marshals. Everyone seemed happy and they all left at 11am to get up the mountain.

The walk up the hill revealed damp but good going and a lot of trail clearing from the previous day, some Moos were taking this far too seriously!!!

I arrived at the start 5 minutes before the first rider, Steam, was off so there was no messing around for me. There were a few spectators at the top and I had OBE on the video camera doing his bit. At 11:50 exactly Steam shot off down the hill with a tot of Whiskey on board to much excitement and shouting from the crowd, he was closely followed by Knotty 30 seconds later. There was then a 10 min break before the next competitor set off as knotty had a surprise for us at the bottom.

Enzo was then the first of the next batch off and what a start!! After 20 yards he was already off his bike as he had taken a wrong turning. Next off was the black horse Reg who seemed to know where he was going and looked fast. By now the nerves were starting to show and Chrissie, especially, was bouncing around like a Bez (Happy Mondays fame) and farting a lot. It didn’t take long before the last man, Gaz, was off and I could then chase them down the hill.

I arrived at the finish to witness at least three Moos in the drinking area before the finish trying in vane to down a warm and shaken up can of Stella in front of an ever growing gaggle of spectators.... what an atmosphere. Knotty’s surprise was a G&T for everyone which was a great idea on such a hot day and very refreshing if a little unhealthy rehydrating drink.

Once everyone had finished I calculated the results and sent everyone off to the TA for the prize giving. Unfortunately I had neglected to check that it was open (2pm opening on Sat) so we all went off to the Royal Oak and sat outside instead (good idea whoever it was). A few beers were downed before the presentation which got every one going. For those who can remember here are the top results:

1st – Gaz
2nd – Chrissie
3rd – Reg – The new Black Horse
Wooden Spoon – Roger
Tw*t of the day – OBE - who ran out of petrol at the top of the mountain.

Thanks to everyone who helped out on the day, Mrs Pealy for bringing around the bubbly, the spectators, and to all those who took part and gave the event such a good atmosphere.

Next year we might do another one.

That’s it for now Moos.

Captain Beaker

P.S. Full results and times on the web site just click here

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