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Captain Beaker - How many off-of's will be written here

12th November 2008

November Newsletter

As I come nearer to the end of my Captaincy I feel a mixed sense of disappointment and loss, and I even have a little tear in my eye..... no I fecking don’t..... I am fed up with all the heckling, your moaning and your general abuse of us with Gingeritus and funny accents..... can’t wait to hand over to the new unlucky bar-steward!!!!

Anyway a ride report should really mention something about the rides.

BOMBS

The first Wednesday ride this month was on the 5th so it was a good excuse for a fireworks theme. The 15 rockets and ride were all provided by Mr. One Inch Punch Russell and, although I was not there, the weather was good and dry, the ride went well and the fireworks were explosive. The highlight of the night was the letting off the now mostly broken fireworks on the mountain the best attempt to kill the Moos was undertaken by Schlong (who should know better). He tried to tie 5 rockets together and let them off at the same time. The result of this stunt had the Moos hitting the deck as the rocket shot off in many directions.... should be good enough for an award I think.

NEW ROUTE

Last week’s ride was a bit of a club ‘mix and match’ ride as there was no nominated ride leader. Gaz, Schlong and me conferred and we ended up climbing Turners and heading over towards the tips and fern mountain using some old trails and some new bits recently found by Schlong and co.

The weather was yet again on our side and even though we covered some mileage it was a great ride. There were two highlights of the night and they were again involved Schlong; the first was a full-on over the bars crash when he hit an axle deep bog seen by most and nearly involving Phil who also hit the bog but was going slower, as he did all night, therefore avoiding a similar crash. The second crash came on the new section of the ride immediately after telling us at the front that ‘this corner will have someone off’. As if by command Schlong again made a spectacular dismount, this time off to the left falling at least 10 foot into the ferns.... what a tw*t.... again I think there has to be an award there somewhere.

The ride ended quite late at the TA for beer food, crap speech and awards.

TWAT went to Crock for being a twat and ginger

RIDER went to Schlong as he is getting old and may not have many years left.

GENERAL STUFF

The Christmas ride this year will be slightly different from previous years in that we will spend more time in the pubs and not do so many. The ride will as usual be fancy dress Santa’s and finish back at the TA. The route will take in our usual haunts and it will be my last official outing as Captain as I am on holiday for the Christmas do so I may have to do a VERY SPECIAL CRAP SPEECH that day.

For those of you who don’t pay into a monthly account there will be a small annual fee to be collected at the end of the year. Haven’t worked out how much it is yet but it is for things like web site charge, insurance and other club sundries.

It has been proposed that there will be a trail building morning this Sunday (22nd) starting at 8.30 at the Fwrmm until about 12 noon. I will mention in my weekly crap speech.

If you are reading this you will be aware of the new front page to the web site designed and produced by Marty. This has been done so that you can see what has been added lately and hopefully will make it easier for anyone to add something you like, not just ride reports. If you want anything included or have anything to say then please feel free and send what you have done to Marty....it doesn’t have to be long or even bike related but if you have a photo then that may make it more interesting.

Final thing for me this week is that the Rally GB is on during the first weekend of December and a few of us were thinking of going to watch a couple of stages on Saturday. Early start and hopefully a good day out.

Let me know if you are interested.

Thanks

Beaker

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