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Captain Beaker - How many off-of's will be written here

16th January 2008

Due to writers block this report has been in conjunction with the Profanisaurus Rex and Stella.

This weeks ride leader was the shy and retiring Ex-Captain (Chrissie), not one to normally step into the limelight and show any authority decided to take the somewhat subdued bunch of 14 Moos into he Machen wood for what some thought would be more Mud Wrestling (A long and messy battle on the toilet, involving much grunting and groaning, which usually ends in either a fall or a submission). The ex’s skill with route planning managed to get all the Moos through the woods, down quarry and up Ochrwyth, where we yet again disturbed more romancing couples in a Fiesta where the gentleman was observed to be burying the Hobbit (to lose Bilbo in the Wizards Sleeve) or something of that nature, we arrived at the cattle grid with out too much trauma, mud and in good time.

We all waited at the cattle grid chatting until Gaz and the now irate Jim arrived, Fast Hands Jim proceeded to physically abuse the Captain for not waiting at the Legion…. Jim is not one too argue with especially in the dark. A quick ascent to the mast was then followed by a series to downhill runs much to everyone’s delight including; carpet (twice), old faithful, Gaz’s new trail and the front trail. I did hear mutters that we had turned in to a rambling club with all the bike pushing but all was forgotten after the descent of the front trail which was particularly slippery, enjoyable and wetter than an Otters pocket.

Back at the TA we were joined by Phil (the Abuser) Dafydd, knotty and Scrippsy for our first and last beer stop. The food was dispensed with in minutes and much beer and laughter was had as usual. It was nice to have Phil back as my speeches were getting a little easy with so little heckling and abuse.

Although it was Knotty’s Birthday he this week he declined a drink saying he wanted to race, and beat, the pint sized, glass chinned caretaker from Bedwas next week and show him who was boss. My money is on the ‘one inch punch’ Russell.

For all you Moos who didn’t hear what was in my speech due to the heckling from the gap toothed drinking lightweight, or who didn’t care, here’s what was said:

Moos Downhill Champs are in May – 10th May 2008. Details to follow but will include beer and split second timing!

Hoodies will be approx £25 each and I’ll bring in colour chart for next week. See www.psmsportswear.com/leisure_wear_05.htm and let me know what colour and style you want I reckon one of these www.psmsportswear.com/leisure_wear_05_PSM36A.htm in Khaki.

The week after next is a Themed ride taken by Steam – Theme is BIG Hands!!! It’s also monthly awards week.
All dates for the year should be finalised by the end of the Month.

The Bristol Bike Festival 12 hour event is on 7/8th June – Let me know who wants to do it so we can get the teams sorted. See www.bike-fest.com/bristol/ for event details. Usually a good weekend of riding, drinking and they usually have a marqué with a band.

Scrippsy’s ‘so-called retirement’ ride and do starts at 3pm at Bus Stop on Saturday 26th Jan.

Finally there has been some noticeable missing riders this week; Options, OBE, Crock 66% attendance, Jock at 33% and still no Farquar even at the Pub…. disappointing for someone of such leisure time.

That's it for this weeks drivel.
Cheers

Beaker

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