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Captain Beaker - How many off-of's will be written here

23rd April 2008

Mootiny on the Mountain

The ride leader was Geoff ‘OBE’ Davies and his addition to the Leaders jacket was clear for all to see – good effort Toad.

Was it his popularity that brought out 26 riders, the highest in Moo history, or perhaps the good weather !!!!!! Did I say 26 riders, sorry I meant 25 riders and Roger.

Even with such numbers there were notable absences –

Option – recent back injury has set him back some weeks – not incurred while riding nor due to his recent return to playing rugby, but down to opening his garage door!!! He did it while reaching down to pick up the remote control he dropped.

Russ – strange how the 100%er has vanished since he introduced Budgie and Jason to the herd! Guys have you checked your caravans lately?

Not so notable absences, Dickie and Enzo – no offence lads just couldn’t think of anything funny to write about you. Oh, and some guy called Jim!!!!!

And most important of all the absences was – Captain Beaker !

It has to be said that the run up to this Wednesday was filled with talk of ‘Clique’s’ & ‘Mutiny’s’ and never has there been so much unrest between the herd. The only way to sort out these issues is to appoint a mediator and I feel the only Moo worthy of such a position is Tom.

The issue of the Clique has already been addressed, a panel of Moo’s has been appointed, they are Chrissy, Gaz, Dai, Rich, Option, Pealy, Johnsy, Berni, Geoff, Daf, Ade, Beaker, Dickie, Ant, Crockett, Jock and Gordon. They have decided that there is no such thing as a clique within the Moos and the Machen lads are very welcoming of our travelling friends and to show our support it has been decided for a trial period that we will split the herd into two groups. This will have a double benefit as it will allow us Machenites to mingle more with the outsiders and also speed up the ride as with the increasing numbers it has been pointed out that a problem is forthcoming.

The first group will be –
Gaz, Ade, Beaker, Pealy, Geoff, Ant, Gordon, Johnsy, Dai, Daf, Option, Chrissy, Dickie, Rich, Crockett, Jock & Gordon

As they are always on time they will leave at 6.30 and be scheduled back at the TA for 9.30 for the waiting food.

The second group will be –
Knotty, Roger, Kev, Marty, Russ, Tom, Harty, Vice, Enzo, Jim, Slug, Pellett, Budgie, Jason

You can meet at 7.00 and arrive at the TA for 10.00 – food will be kept warm for you and you will have sufficient time for a quick pint and then you will have plenty of time to make your long journey’s home, and while you leave the Machen boundary you can look back and say to yourselves ‘those Machen boys are so friendly, I must move there one day’.

The matter of the ‘Mootiny’ is slightly more serious as it was on the 28th April 1789 that the most famous of all Mutiny’s took place – ‘The Mutiny on the Bounty’. So I feel that suspicious undercurrents are happening as with next week being the 228th anniversary of this event, the suspected Mootineers will strike. Will the supporters of Captain Beaker please take note (if there are any!!!) oh yes there is one – Jeff Wherlock !!!!

The ride itself was a fairly pacey trundle through the woods and taking in the more flowing singletrack decent to the car park. Geoff then displayed his old rugby skills with the first ‘Dummy’ of the day when he sidestepped the Maenllwyd’s steps, causing the Herd to stall their steeds at the first watering hole, however, with a drop of the left shoulder he was off again.

Into the Lisvane woods for a drop down the steps and onto the pleasant climb to the top. It has to be noted that the little wooden jump that has been built had to be ridden by a few of the Herd, we lesser mortals know you can ride off it, but for heavens sake isn’t it about time that you did something ‘flashy’ or ‘risky’, so at least we can all have a good laugh when you crash. Stop riding within your comfort zone – push the limits!!!!!

Down along the fence we headed, still at a fair pace, and it was a climb back passed the well parked land rover – did anyone else see Chrissy reaching in behind the driver’s seat picking up the loose change off the floor, £1.38 he collected.

The second ‘Dummy’ was delivered as the pending herd were building up for the drop of death when Geoff deceived us all with a dart down the decent to the back of the Old Griffin Pub.

On to Rudry common and a nice climb up the grassy steps to the very top. A very quick descent then to the Maenllwyd for refuelling.

A flavour of the forthcoming summer months was had as the first pint was enjoyed on the patio, but it was a return to the warmth of the Bar for the next 2.

The mad dash down the forestry ensued and it was back to HQ for the scoff. It must be said that Roger has overcome his fear as he ‘flew’ passed his crash point and quickened his descent like a Cardiff Man Possessed or is that a Possessed Cardiff Man, or maybe a Man Obssessed with Cardiff, or even a Cardiffian Obssessed with Men, yes that’s it!!

At HQ there was a very noticeable silence and good order from the boys when ex-captain Stunt got up to speak and presented Budgie with his ‘Welcome to the Herd’ pint of Guinness, which he dispatched with the speed that only Captain Beaker would have been proud of, shame he was not there to see it.

That was not the last we saw of Stunt that evening as he was caught on camera or rather set up on camera dipping into the subs jar for £1 to make up the funds to buy the last round of the night. He didn’t even offer the £1.38 he had pilfered from the stranded land rover earlier in the night. The action is to be linked on the website.

That’s it for this week except to say, Cliques don’t exist in this club, oh and remember you ‘outsiders’ are to start at 7.00 and we will meet you at 10.00 in the TA.

Yours proud to be a Machen boy


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