

THEY
ARE TRYING TO F**KING KILL US 'AGAIN'
something about the goons visiting the miggly moos that brings out
the sick individuals in your group.just cos options broke his arm on
the innaugral meeting between the 2 bitter rivals, the moos have consistantly
tried to maim,injure,verbally abuse and generally upset the goons on
every visit.personally i think your a bunch of c##ts which is why its
such a joy to meet up with the moos annually.as usual we were greeted
with a superb welcome and joined in the pic & mix with a few goons
getting in on the action,darknell had to fling shit,shep and shaggy
picked a climb,archie got a descent and i had to be jumped by some
one.up the 1st climb the goons showed they're strength with numerous
riders ripping up the hill fast as,1st of the tests sees crocket trying
to skid 20 stride and failing,not all is lost as darknell gets some
horse sh*t and throws it at crockett as he doing his skid,success for
paul and he don't have to head beer.then we start to descend some awesome
singletrack hand built by the moos very own trail pixies,this is where
the tables turn and moos rip up the trail like trail fairies,where
the f**k is darknell?fearing the worst he suddenley turns up to report
a moo is down injured on his own turf.only a twisted ankle.next up,or
down as it should be is BROKE BACK MOUNTAIN,lower your saddle and you'll
be fine said a voice,standing at the top watching moo after moo ride
over the top i decide i'll have a go when suddenly reg goes over the
top and crashes into a tree,f**k that where's the chicken run followed
by all the goons except o'boyle and porter we all make it to the relative
safety of TURNERS LANE.what a bastard of a climb,the goons love a tarmac
climb.with a few of the tasks to get out the way owgie promptly fails
his test then knotty nails his with a little help from crockett,and
i think its slug gets the last test of the day done by wiping em out.HOME
TERRITORY and archie picking the descent,some fast flowing single track
followed by BRICK LANE.wet and slippery the moos enjoy one of our hidden
gems.more tasks and gippo gets bunny hopped by SOME ONE,of up the trail
and the 1st mechanical sees scrippsy breaking his chain,it must be
the power.chain fixed climb up to the coal tips on machen,STILL trying
to kill one of us gaz takes us down a scary scree slope,only one goon
completes the test JM.all other goons take the easy option which sees
shaggy cart wheeling down the easy bit,no injuries a couple of scary
moments and we're all of up to the top of machen.snare wins the granny
ring race and owgie looses the drinking.down the MACHEN DESCENT again
the trail pixies have been doing themselves proud with the best descent
in the area down into machen village,a few scary bits for darknell
and sheppy but they get down safe with the help of one of the moos.into
the pub and the miggly moos hospitality is now legendry,samosas,spring
rolls,onion rings,chicken wings ,chips bread and butter,f**king tidy
darts.with the riding out the way we get a few beers down with awards
going out to best rider,f**k knows who had that but scrippsy got twat
of the month and i got a new award made up specially for me on the
night.the award turns out to be a pint of guiness with some funny taste
that me and scrippsy got to bolt ,as quick as poss,don't fancy my chances
against this seasoned ex probut to my surprise i get to within 2 tenths
of a second of the record held by the moos big swiller daffyd.with
all the fun over and last orders called at the bar its time for goons
to head home.big thanks to scrippsy and jeff for getting the ride soughted
at such short notice,look forward to seeing you some time in september,all
the best JM (goon commander)
