This week’s ride was allocated to me late Wednesday afternoon when Captain Peal rang to state that Berni could not take the pre-downhill ride due to outside commitments, Captain himself would be late too, and the responsibility therefore fell on my shoulders...
Before describing the events of the ride, I have managed to find out the reason why 1. Bernard could not take the ride and 2. Why Captain was late. From a reliable source (thanks OBE) the reason of Bernard’s recent absenteeism of late is he has decided to join an amateur version of the Black and White Minstrels group, touring various Workman Clubs in South Wales – For ticket information please contact Bernard, the prices apparently are very accommodating...
Secondly the reason for the Captains lateness on the ride was indirectly caused by Gordon losing the Moo Thong on his previous ride, the Captain therefore had to attend an Ann Winters Thong night to source new material for future ride leaders, here is one as modelled by Captain himself...
Back to the ride – 26 riders set off from Legion meeting point and onwards up to the forestry and to the usual meeting place past the bench (which is no longer there) from this point we took a left and then a right and descended and ascended onto the start of the Carling Tree run. The conditions were superb, dry, fast surely everyone would nail the boulder jump at the bottom of the run? A few people refused the jump, namely Knotty, Reg and our resident “Look at me I’ve lost a stone recently” – Tom, apparently this was down to a dodgy knee? Everyone waited with baited breath as first Andy Griffiths came a cropper over the jump (unfortunately he didn’t hurt himself enough to rule him out of next week’s ride) and secondly Dai the Eye instead of landing safely decided to do a Newbury style somersault over the handlebars – maybe Dai’s been watching too much Gymnastics at the Commonwealth games of late?
Next to come was a quick climb up through the quarry and onwards up to Ade’s run, vice brought up the rear and noticed several riders walking over the wooden bridge instead of riding across – one that springs to mind was the sex machine known simple as Rog!
Ade’s trail which is part one of next week’s downhill run took us all the way to the lane whereby we picked up the 27th rider of the night Captain Peal, the Ann Winters party finished early so he was able to participate, from this point it was a quick dash to the hairy bush for a pint.
During the consumption of the drinks Gordon announced that he had received a package earlier on that evening that was posted through his letterbox in a jiffy bag – by all accounts the message on the package was from an anonymous person who had found the Moo Thong and knew by the bummy smell that it belonged to Gordon.
After breaking the good news to everyone we all set off for the climb upwards to the mast. Once at the summit Captain summarised the rules for next Wednesday’s downhill night – the first to be held in the dark – look out literally!
Vice led the herd through the gorse and over the fence down one of the runs (not sure of the name – maybe Koala?) and then it was down the front bum trail all the way to HQ.
Once food had been consumed (thanks again for the spread girls), it was onto the birthday drink for Harty and the prestigious 10th Moo Ride award for Breadarms (thanks to Captain for letting Breadarms use his XXXL Moo shirt for the photo), this award was presented by a man still striving to hit the magical figure of 10 rides Mr Wing Wang Wong Ken Newbury!
The usual banter and pints flowed, I seem to recall a conversation I heard between Crockett and Tom, now I’m not sure if you are aware but Gill is away for a few days in New York and Tom is obviously home alone, Crockett was giving his advice on “cooking for one at home”, some of the culinary dishes I heard mentioned included:
Remember next week is the Downhill race and also forms part of the Sports Night series with points up for grabs for all, any bike can be entered with 2 downhill runs scheduled; please be at the Legion for a prompt 6.30 start.
As they say in Fronce – Bon Appétit Rodney!
Ring Ding Ding