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Welcome the new Captaincy

16th February 2011

Phil's ride

The Herd met at the usual place outside the Leg-iron, wondering where our Phil would lead us on such a fine evening. There were 27 Moos with 2 Non Moos, Jason and Lee. Noticeable absences were Vice Newbs, Schlong, Johnsy, Dai the eye, OBE, Farquar, etc etc etc.

Phil wanted to lead the herd up onto the Ridgeway and on top of Caerphilly Mtn, there were a few simple mechanicals along the way which caused a few of the herd to moan and whine like farm animals.

All in all a good traditional XC ride with lots of different riding styles chucked in there.
We gained a new member of the Herd. James. AKA. Dave

Later in the night there was an old man who wanted to tell the remaining few lads a story of when they were young, lustful, extremely horny, randy and full of cccccccccccuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmpassion.


Here's how it goes:

Now, for reasons unsure they decided that they absolutely *had* to have sex on her parents bed. In the middle of broad daylight. Perfectly on display.

Well, they undressed, and were well on our way to getting things in motion when one jumped up, stated that they had to get the KY jelly from downstairs, and went running. Now, at the bottom of the stairs would bring you right by front door, and the front door was a long window . As one came back up, stark naked mind you, they happened to glance out the window. And who should they see, but the father putting his key in the lock?

Panicked, they ran around the parents bedroom, hysterically shouting something about the father being home, and how the boyfriend should hide under the bed (they had mere seconds now between safety and discovery). Taking the safer route, the boyfriend grabbed all of his clothes, and ran in to the wardrobe not to be noticed-- *Time slows down*. The girlfriend distracts her father by offering him a cup of tea, although the father is not interested. He goes up stairs to change his shirt from sweating profusely from a hard days work, and he opens the wardrobe to discover a fully naked man stood in his wardrobe. The father shuts the wardrobe door and turns around to the daughter as his jaw is on the floor. The naked man gets out of the ward robe trying to get dressed with a semi erect penis still on display, and runs like a whippet out of the house and down the road.

Wardrobe Lurker

Next weeks ride will be take by the legend X Capt Pealy, then we are going back to the Leg-iron for a 1 off , for some lovely Chicken Curry ale' carte'.

Captain Daff

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