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Welcome the new Captaincy

20th April 2011

Sport Night 2 - The Moos at the Olympics & A Mutiny from the Monte

26 of the herd met at the Legion at 6pm, each Moo was in curiosity with not knowing what to expect. They were led into the Legion and recognised 26 Guinness’ were at the bar. The first event of the night would see each of the Moos bolt a pint of Guinness. The quickest Moo would have the opportunity to score the total amount of riders out on the night. There was some ‘hecking’ and retching as each Moo swigged back the black stuff!!!! Our Phil was one, as he said “I’ve just had my f#####g tea.” Oh well Phil it was your birthday, ‘get it down you.’ After witnessing some times as fast as 3.4 seconds and others of38.4 seconds (no names mentioned at this point) it was time to prepare for the next event.

We then prepared to give each Moo an egg with their name on it with all good intentions of each Moo having to carry the egg around throughout the night. Along with trying to keep the egg whole, to be awarded 20 points. Although during the time Newbury was handing them out, who came from behind him and ‘launched’ the tray into the air, but Wrighty the Mr and Mrs Champion. The tray of 30 eggs ended all over the floor, so the good intentions of carrying an egg around ended splattered all over outside the Legion. The Mr and Mrs Champ did however have egg on his face as Newbs catapulted an egg hurdling into the air landing straight into Wrighty’s face.

The herd was then led over to the recreational ground (rec) where the second event took place. Extreme Cycle Polo was the game planned out for each Moo to take part in, as they took to the field in 4 a side teams to compete against each other. There was a little lad on the field disrupting the game initially of the name of Jed, the El- Presidente’ had to escort the little whipper snapper off for us to commence. So armed with homemade Polo bats the herd went head-to-head, or shall I say ‘literally’ bike-2-bike. The bats were cracking against each other; the hockey ball was flying around skimming through the Moo’s legs, through their frames and their components. The herd picked up the game in remarkable speed as they were making some cracking goals. Some almost scoring hat-tricks (sorry Opts the time had gone over the HT), others just happy to slog the ball down the field to cause major disruption. Then on the final match a surreal event occurred when a Ginger kamikaze rider went ‘pelting’ down the field and Jimmy Mac stood on guard of his goals, they collided and they continued to thrash out for the ball, not recognising that Jimmy’s bike was cracked in half!!!! Ouch!!!!

The third event was starting to get under way, firstly the herd was led up to Rudry via doing Broke-Back (where Budgie went into a branch almost severing off his ear), onto the viaducts towards Waterloo and heading up towards the Monte. Reg’s Crash Site was to be the place for the last event; each Moo would take part in The Shooting Gallery and would have the opportunity to shoot one shot on target at a picture of Scripsy’s face. Only one of the Moo’s hit bull’s eye, unexpectedly it was Griff the racing snake; good shot Griff you obviously have other talents like ‘shooting up’!! And some other shots were skimming the Capt, and I was 4 metres away from the target. Although I think they were deliberate, as I know how much you all love your Captain. Like a hole in the head!!!!

After everyone had taken their shot the Monte was our next port of call. The drink was going down nicely as the blistering heat quenched our thirst. Our Tom and Dode had birthday drinks and everyone seemed to be quite merry. All of a sudden Capt calls for everyone to head down to the Tits and Ass (TA), as the delicacies would have soon been ready for us to feast upon, although my call fell against deaf ears to a selection of the Moos who remained insitu as the rest headed down to the TA. Who was leading the ‘Mutiny in the Monte’ but our very own Vice Capt Newbs, Bread Arms, Wrighty, Strawbs, Option, Crocket, Tom, Owgie, Harty and Feather. Such behaviour should be held up in Kangaroo’s court for you all to be TRIALED and brought to justice for ‘Mutineering in the Monte.’ The case continues until next time. Although I do remember being one of the Mutineers some months ago, and in another 7 months’ time maybe I’ll return to such behaviour. Although until then; the case continues!!!

Overall a night of totally different antics and events that I/we will never take part in again or have the imagination to re-do. (Or won’t we) Thanks to everyone who took part, offered me some pointers/ideas on how to organise such an event and even gave some materials to build the bats, cheers Phil for that gas pipe, it worked well. Well that was the last of the actual sports evenings this year, and as an observer I can recognise how determined and f#####g bonkers we all are.

May the shenanigans continue!!!!

Feather’s ride next week.

Over and out.

Captain Daf, Daffney, Twentieth century toy boy, Toy s#####r, Sheep s#####r, Dr Bungle, The Ritalin Kid, Capt C### and whatever else.

Cheers Guys

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